ineffable f

September 20, 1999

Mr. Pinkwater,

You were right about the malevolent forces. Thanks for the warning. I was able to buy a pair of comfortable shoes in time, and I think that saved me.

Here’s the thing, though. I have an abalemma (defined in The Meaning of Liff as “The agonizing situation in which there is only one possible decision but you still can’t take it.”), which is as follows:

I’m going to a prom in Chicago next week. Not like a school prom. It’s run by this old guy who pours everyone coffee and plays swing music, and there’s cats running all over the place. Very classy. That’s not my abalemma. This is:

I have to ask Shakes to go with me, but I can’t. What should I do?

Incidentally, we’re starting a revolution. We’re going to overthrow the government and make me king of the world. Will you vote for me?

Would you vote for you? Will you vote for me?